Read the latest news from around Midway, all given a rabid right-wing slant by our MORON staff - and its rabid right-wing readers!

Saturday, July 20, 2024

Audi Crashes Through Shop Window In Halliton High Street...Again!

Stock photo of Audi crashed through shop window.

For the second time in three months, a high-powered Audi ploughed through the window of the Halliton MiniMart in Halliton High Street yesterday evening, causing an extensive amount of damage to the shop and leading to the closure of the road. 

Police attended the scene and arrested the driver of the vehicle, who was breathalysed and found to have 140 milligrams of alcohol in 100 ml of breath - four times the legal limit.  

The driver turned out to be same man who was responsible for the previous incident and was taken into custody. He had earlier been ejected from a nearby pub for unruly behaviour.

Owner Sandeep Patel said "I've only just got the shop fully up and running after the last crash. I recognised the driver from the last time and I can't believe he's done it again. He was fighting mad, shouting and swearing, and wasn't wearing any trousers or underpants. Fortunately the police turned up quite quickly and took him into custody."

"We've got the window boarded up and hopefully we'll be able to open up again soon."

The road has since reopened.

“A man was arrested after a shop in Halliton High Street was struck and damaged by a vehicle last night,” a police spokesman said later. “The driver subsequently received a formal caution from our Chief Constable, who warned him that any further such behaviour may lead to a final warning and subsequent disciplinary proceedings at their Masonic lodge. He was then released without charge.”

“We trust that the prompt action taken by Midway’s police officers will serve as a deterrent to all drink-drivers,” the Midway police spokesman continued, “unless, of course, you have all of the right connections in which case, it’s ‘Get Out Of Jail Free”…”

"Not that we can send anyone to jail any more, because they are all full...."

 

Comments: 

Please note that we do not moderate comments. However, we may edit or delete them, or manipulate the voting on them in order to reflect our editorial policy.

Grey Mondeo Man wrote:

So yet again, the one-man drunken crime-wave that is Undercover Imbiber gets away with (this comment has been edited for brevity - Ed.)

👎-197

Kent’s Greatest Prick Ever replied:

You silly boy. The sooner you grow up and learn that “privilege” means exactly that, the happier your betters will be.

👍+63

David Simile the Second replied:

A typically stupid comment from GreyMondeoMan, a typically stupid remoaning socialist La**or-supporting woke snowflake. Like all lazy parasitic leftist scum, you are a blight on society and as such are unable to hold any sort of discussion without resorting to vile, frothing insults. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, Guardian-reading pillock.

👍+234