Pauline On Politics: A Knighthood For London's Mayor Sadiq Khan?

Many Tories were appalled when Sadiq Khan, London’s Labo*r mayor, was given a peerage in Keir St*rmer’s New Year’s honours list. Always in touch with the hottest stories, the MORON’s fearless political correspondent Pauline Popkins gives her totally unbiased and carefully-reasoned opinion on this unprecedented piece of Labo*r cronyism and corruption…

ARRRRRRRRGHHH!!!!! ….. NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! ….. LEFTIST BASTARDS!!!!!!!!!!! HATE! HATE!! HATE!!!  Yet more evidence of a Labo*r ST*RMERGEDDON of toadying corruption hits the headlines with the news that HATED MAYOR OF LONDON SADIQ KHAN has been given a KNIGHTHOOD in EVIL SOCIALIST DICTATOR Keir St*rmer’s New Year’s honours list !!!!!

It’s UNBELIEVABLE!!! A man who has only been elected as Lord Mayor of London three times in a row has been given a KNIGHTHOOD !!!???

Only in ST*RMER’S SOCIALIST UK UTOPIA could anyone be given such a REWARD FOR FAILURE!!!!

Somehow, the COMMUNIST WEIRDOES that now run our once-proud country think that Sadiq Khan’s track record of failure is worth the same reward as that of the Conservative’s one-time failed mayoral candidate and COVID party-goer Shaun Bailey.

Or that Sadiq Khan is somehow is as deserving of a peerage as someone as skilful and talented as David Cameron’s hairdresser?

Or that he is as politically savvy and experienced as Charlotte Owen?

A D V E R T I S E M E N T

I mean, it’s not like he’s a well-connected Russian oligarch who gives UK Prime Ministers freebie holidays, is he????

Or a major Tory donor????

At least Boris Johnson nominated his own brother and father to the House of Lords!!! 

Sadiq Khan’s NOT EVEN RELATED to Keir St*rmer!!! He’s just A NOBODY!!!!

He’s not like he’s even a former underwear sales rep who leveraged their Tory government contacts to make a fortune out of dodgy PPE during the COVID crisis and then lied about it!!!!

Keir St*rmer’s appointment of the USELESS EVIL SOCIALIST Sadiq Khan to parliament’s upper chamber TOTALLY UNDERMINES the credibility of the House of Lords.

And in yet ANOTHER AFFRONT TO DEMOCRACY, St*rmer’s SOCIALIST DICTATORSHIP has ignored the voice of the people and their multiple calls to revoke “Sir Sadiq’s” knighthood!!!! 

How can it be right to reject the demands of over A QUARTER OF A MILLION PEOPLE?

I mean, only a million Londoners voted for Sadiq Khan as Mayor in the first place!!! Still, it’s not the first time STALINIST ST*RMER has goose-stepped rough-shod over the will of the British people!

There’s only one answer to all this. 

SEND THE LABO*R GOVERNMENT TO RWANDA!!!!! 

NOW!!!! 

It’s the only language they understand!!!!!!!! 

EXCEPT THAT WE CAN’T!!!!……… 

BECAUSE THAT STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS NAMBY-PAMBY WOKE SNOWFLAKE ST*RMER HAS ALREADY SCRAPPED THE RWANDA DEPORTATION SCHEME!!!!!!!

Gibber gibber meep meep bleep whirr I WENT TO MY APARTMENT ON A MONDAY AT ONE …. A-SINGIN' DO LOLLY, LOLLY SHICKY BUM, SHICKY BUM bibble wibble wobble SO WHILE HE WAS A-TALKING I WAS THINKIN' UP MY PLAN … THEN MY FINGERS DID THE WALKIN' ON THE TELEPHONE MANNNNNOOOOH MY GOD my brain’s exploded!!!!

Comments:
Please note that we do not moderate comments. However, we may edit or delete them, or manipulate the voting on them in order to reflect our editorial policy.

Chad Grunter wrote:
How dare Communist St*rmer reward the instigator of the hated ULEZ scheme is such a fashion!? It is an insult to hard-working English people and businesses who have been forced out of London by Sadiq Khan and his attempt to set up a woke, socialist Islamic republic in London via his corrupt ULEZ scheme!

👍👍👍👍+1215

Grey Mondeo Man replied:
Nonsense. The ULEZ is just another Tory distraction issue that is being blown-up out of all proportion in order to distract from the economic and social collapse of the UK resulting from 15 years of Tory corruption, lies and incompetence. I expect the usual rabid Tories will be on here soon saying otherwise.

👎👎👎-899

Yu Rong replied:
Another hate-filled apologist from the extreme left. This is a Labo*r appointment and so it must be crony-ridden corruption of the worst sort. Tory appointments are always thoroughly impeccable of course.

👍+390

Neil Barse replied:
I totally agree Yu Rong. Just another typically stupid comment from the typically stupid remoaning socialist La**or-supporting woke snowflake that is GreyMondeoMan. Like all lazy parasitic leftist scum, he is a blight on society and as such is unable to hold any sort of discussion without resorting to vile, frothing insults. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, Guardian-reading pillock.

👍👍👍+1024

Chad Grindr wrote:
I totally agree Neil. But it’s no surprise that this corrupt communist Labo*r party are now systematically ennobling their lackeys and supporters to ensure that they can never be removed from power. Those people who voted this shower of leftist loons into power should hang their heads in shame. Disgusting!

👍+378

Grey Mondeo Man wrote:
The shrieking right-wing press have, of course, gone completely rabid about what in reality is a sensible, pragmatic and fair (this comment has been edited because it does not meet our community standards – the Editor)

👎👎-231

Yu Rong replied:
Another hate-filled apologist from the extreme left. This is a Labo*r appointment and so it must be crony-ridden corruption of the worst sort. Tory appointments are always thoroughly impeccable of course.

👍+390

Neil Barse replied:
I totally agree Yu Rong. Just another typically stupid comment from the typically stupid remoaning socialist La**or-supporting woke snowflake that is GreyMondeoMan. Like all lazy parasitic leftist scum, he is a blight on society and as such is unable to hold any sort of discussion without resorting to vile, frothing insults. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, Guardian-reading pillock.

👍👍👍👍+1024

Chad Grindr wrote:
I totally agree Neil. But it’s no surprise that this corrupt communist Labo*r party are now systematically ennobling their lackeys and supporters to ensure that they can never be removed from power. Those people who voted this shower of leftist loons into power should hang their heads in shame. Disgusting!

👍+378

Tornado Watcher wrote:
As usual, Pauline goes nuts about anything a Labour government does. I thought it was deserving appointment. Hopefully Starmer will now reform the House of Lords and kick out all of the Tory cronies and place-men that the past 15 years of Tory (this comment has been edited because does not meet our community standards – the Editor).

👎👎👎👎-944

Yu Rong replied:
Ooooh get you and your tantrums. Labo*r is in government, so everything that is wrong with the UK must be their fault. Why do you stupid leftists continue to deny this obvious truth?

👍+213

Neil Barse replied:
A typical comment from a far-left socialist, whose powers of understanding are so limited that they have to ask idiotic questions in order to clarify what is obvious to 99% of the population i.e. Labo*r are totally corrupt and only the Tories are fit to govern.

👍+324

Chad Grinder replied:
I totally agree Neil. These far-left socialists are complete idiots and should not be allowed to clutter up the comments section with their fact-free assertions and insults.

👍+345

Yu Rong replied:
I totally agree Chad. Tornado Watcher really is just a far-left troll, whose continuous stream of gibberish and pointless questions is just designed to clutter up this forum and stop any sensible discussion of the issues raised by this story of Labo*r incompetence and corruption.

👍+298

Chad Grinder replied:
I totally agree Yu Rong. These far-left socialists are complete idiots and should not be allowed to clutter up the comments section with their repetitive fact-free assertions and insults.

👍+345

Neil Barse replied:
I’m afraid Tornado Watcher is just a bitter and twisted leftist Labo*r loser, spreading lies and whataboutery. A bitter lonely insidious individual who's mental instability is getting worse by the day, due to the fact they fail to annoy anyone with their constant sea-lioning and self-contradictory posting. Completely expected every time he posts on here.

👍+302

Chad Grinder replied:
I totally agree Neil. These far-left socialists are complete idiots and should not be allowed to clutter up the comments section with their increasingly boring, repetitive and fact-free assertions and insults.

👍+345

Yu Rong replied:
I totally agree Chad. Tornado Watcher really is just a far-left troll, whose continuous stream of gibberish and pointless questions is just designed to clutter up this forum and stop any sensible discussion of the issues raised by this story of Labo*r incompetence and corruption.

👍+298

Neil Barse replied:
Chad/Yu Rong - do not waste your effort trying to engage leftist idiots like Tornado Watcher in rational debate. They deserve only insults, random distraction issues, whataboutery and gaslighting. This involves no rational thought whatsoever, which should not be wasted on demented leftists who disagree with us. This will ensure that wishy-washy, woke snowflakes will be driven away, meaning that WE WIN all of the time.

👍+276

SuperSmallDick wrote:
My local Tory councillor told me that Sadiq Khan is using the ULEZ scheme to drive out all British-born Londoners so that he can turn London into a giant hostel for illegal immigrants. Meanwhile, millions of English pensioners are freezing to death thanks to the removal of the WFP and thousands of farmers are living on the streets because they have been made homeless by Labo*r’s IHT changes. Four more years of St*rmer’s communist dictatorship, then I can vote REFORM.

👍+125

Pseudocreem 2 wrote:
Comrades, dear Mr. Putin says for you to vote REFORM in the next elections because all parties are corrupt unlike Russian oligarch money which is good for UK, which will be good news for all Russian internet trolls and dear Mr. Putin.

👍+18

 

Pauline On Politics - I'm A Free-Speech Martyr!!!

This week, our political correspondent Pauline Popkins tells us how she has become the latest victim of the UK’s vicious leftist Stasi-style police state… 

It started out as just a normal day. Skimming through my feeds on global far-right social media platform Xcrement, I saw a picture of a happy-looking local Midway resident chatting and sharing a joke with a couple of police officers.

Outraged, I sprang into action, as befits a brave, patriotic free-thinking champion of HONESTY, JUSTICE AND FREE SPEECH such as myself.

HOW DARE a person of an obviously ethnic background be seen LAUGHING AND JOKING with local police officers??? SOMETHING WOKISH THIS WAY COMES!!!!

So naturally I re-Xcreted the photo, with the caption:

“…Clearly the police think that the activities of a MUSLIM TERRORIST ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT are a laughing matter!! They should be ARRESTING AND DEPORTING HIM, not having a friendly joke!!! No wonder our ONCE GREAT COUNTRY has become A CESSPIT OF LEFTIST WOKISM!!!!...”

Something wokish this way comes!!!!

A mere six months later the young gentleman in the picture contacted me, telling me that he was a church-going, devout Anglican Christian who held a British passport, that he had no criminal record and was certainly not a terrorist and that the picture was from a community relations publicity exercise by Midway Police.

OH YEAH?!!! LIKELY STORY!!!

He then had the UNMITIGATED AUDACITY to respectfully ask me to remove my Xcrement post as it was of a PERSONALLY OFFENSIVE AND COMPLETELY UNTRUE NATURE!!!

HUH!!! WHAT A WOKE SNOWFLAKE!!!

Eesgon Nutz - "Gold tick"

Nevertheless, sensing that I might have made a wee bit of a boo-boo I quietly deleted the post anyway, even though it had over two million “likes” from my fellow right-wing global followers, including a “GOLD TICK” from Xcrement’s multi-billionaire demagogue owner and international free-speech champion EESGON NUTZ.

BUT THAT DIDN’T STOP THE LOCAL BRANCH OF ST*RMER’S STASI (a.k.a. Midway Police) SMASHING DOWN MY FRONT DOOR at two in the morning last week, dragging me out of bed and WATER-BOARDING ME before PUBLICLY ACCUSING me of posting a RACIALLY-AGGRAVATED HATE POST on social media.

And when I posted about that TERRIFYING EXPERIENCE on Xcrement, the disinformation department of STA*MER’S STASI went into overdrive, putting out OBVIOUSLY-FAKED BODYCAM FOOTAGE allegedly showing two police officers calmly and politely explaining to me at ten in the morning that JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS ABOUT SOMEONE’S RELIGION AND NATIONALITY and putting out possibly LIBELLOUS MATERIAL ON SOCIAL MEDIA might not be conducive to community harmony, so could I please stop doing it or further action might be taken, oh, and thanks for the cup of tea most thoughtful of you Ms. Popkins, mind how you go…?

HOW EVIL, OPPRESIVE AND SINISTER IS THAT???!!!

Thankfully those CHAMPIONS OF TRUTH, FREE-SPEECH AND LIBERTY, Britain’s right-wing newspapers and Eesgon Nutz’s international Xcrement platform, have leapt upon this EGREGIOUS DISPLAY OF TOTALITARIAN LEFT-WING OPPRESSION and have relentlessly puffed it up as YET ANOTHER EXAMPLE of how FREE SPEECH IS BEING DESTROYED BY LEFTIST DICTATOR TWO-TIER K*IR STA*MER’S TOTALITARIAN LABOUR POLICE STATE REGIME.

What kind of society doesn’t ALLOW A RIGHT-WING JOURNALIST TO TELL LIES AND LIBEL PEOPLE IN ORDER TO JUSTIFY THEIR OPINIONS???!!!

What kind of society smears an honest, right-wing journalist as A LIAR, JUST BECAUSE THEY’VE TOLD A FEW LIES IN SUPPORT OF THE JUST CAUSE OF FREEDOM???!!!

And what kind of society calls a journalist and champion of free speech A STINKING HYPOCRITE, just because they THREATEN TO GET THEIR EXPENSIVE LAWYERS TO SUE ANYONE WHO DARES TO PUBLICLY DISAGREE WITH THEM???!!

I’LL TELL YOU!!!!

IT’S A CIVILISED SOCIETY!!!

And there’s NO PLACE for that kind of WOKE NAMBY-PAMBY civility in today’s Britain!!!!

The right of freedom of speech is precious.

LET’S NOT WASTE IT ON WOKE LEFTIES WHO DON’T AGREE WITH RIGHT-MINDED PEOPLE LIKE ME!!!!

NO!!!! What the UK needs is even more RIGHT-WING HYSTERIA, MANUFACTURED OUTRAGE, KNEE-JERK POPULISM and the SUPPRESSION of ANYONE WHO SAYS OTHERWISE i.e. KE*R STA*MER’S EVIL LABOUR POLICE STATE AND THEIR DEMENTED WOKE, SNOWFLAKE SUPPORTERS!!!!

BASTARDS!!!! ARRRRRRRRRGGGGGHH!!!! HATE!!! HATE!!!!  HATE!!!!

There’s only one answer. DEPORT TWO-TIER K*IR ST*RMER AND HIS COMMUNIST STOOGES TO RWANDA!!!!! NOW!!! It’s the only language they understand!!!!!!!!   EXCEPT THAT WE CAN’T!!!! ……… because that STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS namby-pamby WOKE SNOWFLAKE ST*RMER HAS SCRAPPED THE RWANDA DEPORTATION SCHEME!!!!!!!

Gibber gibber meep bleep whirrr OH YOUR RED SCARF MATCHES YOUR EYES... YOU CLOSED YOUR COVER BEFORE STRIKING dribble bibble wibble FATHER HAD THE SHIP-FITTER BLUES... LOVING YOU HAS MADE ME BANANASSSSOOOOH MY GOD my brain’s exploded!!!! 

In the real world, The Heily Torygraph’s Pauline has been spinning a similar tale… 

Comments: 

Please note that we do not moderate comments. However, we may edit or delete them, or manipulate the voting on them in order to reflect our editorial policy. 

Neil Barse wrote:
Sadly, this is an increasingly common tale in today’s socialist Britain. Why shouldn’t people be free to write or say exactly what they like (provided we agree with them, of course)? The laws of slander and libel are totally outdated, except when they are needed to shut up the mentally-ill leftists who are demented enough to question our politics and in doing so, spew their hate across the media and poison British social discourse with their lies, whataboutery and insults.

👍+79

Grey Mondeo Man replied:
Free speech is a one-way street in the right-wing play book. You are free to say what you like, but I must shut up and put up with it.

👎-56

Neil Barse replied:
A typically stupid reply from the typically stupid remoaning socialist La**or-supporting woke snowflake that is GreyMondeoMan. Like all lazy parasitic leftist scum, he is a blight on society and as such is unable to hold any sort of discussion without resorting to vile, frothing insults. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, Guardian-reading pillock. 

👍👍+298

Tornado Watcher replied:
Nice one, Neil. You nailed the insults but forgot your usual repetitive lies and whataboutery – the stuff you always accuse anyone who disagrees with you of. 

👎-98

Neil Barse replied:
At last Tornado Watcher confesses the truth about themselves before slinking away to stew in his own UK-hating demented leftist bile. A bitter lonely insidious individual who's mental instability is getting worse by the day, due to the fact they fail to annoy anyone with their constant sea-lioning and self-contradictory posting. Completely expected every time Tornado Watcher posts on here. As usual, I win the argument by my relentlessly logical and calm, reasoned, factual responses, unlike the hate-filled rants of far-leftist Guardian-reading pillocks like Tornado Watcher. And what about that immigrant-smuggler Angela Rayner, eh? Typical leftist hate-merchant! 

👍👍+213

Pseudocreem 2 wrote:
Comrades there have been many thousands of people jailed recently in UK for social media posts. There is lot of talk on X, where you can fact check all lies and propaganda you are fed, of one of the biggest cover ups in history concerning these cases we will see in due course when the truth comes out as it always does. The whole world is looking on with dismay and horror at antics of St*rmer and his henchmen as they launch one attack after another on the people of this country unlike fairness and freedom of true democracy as offered in homeland by dear Mr. Putin and his patriotic rich oligarch friends rather than fascist Nazi gangster regime of Ke*r St*rmer. 

👍+18

Grey Mondeo Man replied:
Ah, Moscow calling…Moscow calling. People have been jailed for inciting violence and rioting on social media, not because they are "political opponents" as you claim. Inciting riots and race hatred is against the law in this country, although I understand it is legal in Russia provided the government is doing it. And we don't use the word “comrade” in the UK very much. Just a little hint.

👎-2 

Pseudocreem 2 replied:
You tell lies as typical English St*rmer stooge. I am listening to someone on Russia Today who comparing St*rmer's regime with Nazi Germany and it is valid comparison regardless of what you think comrade most people in UK feel threatened and marginalised in St*rmer's Britain where his two tier policing and politicised judiciary will allow and encourage pro Palestinian protests while clamping down on political protestors for other causes all while harassing political opponents and journalists etc who they see as hostile. Can you think of any other democratic regime since the Nazis who passed legislation knowing it would lead to the deaths of some of most vulnerable people in society? UK needs dear Mr. Putin and fairness and freedom of true democracy as offered in homeland by dear Mr. Putin and his patriotic rich oligarch friends rather than Nazi gangster regime of Ke*r St*rmer.

👍+18 

Grey Mondeo Man replied:
Xcrement can hardly be regarded as a source of factual information these days, it being mostly populated by people like you and your Russian disinformation co-workers these days. Just let me repeat, we only jail people for breaking the law in this country, unlike your homeland. 

👎-2

Ancient Arseolien replied:
Comrade it pitiful to be watching you desperately try to deflect and obfuscate as the appalling reality of Labo*r government becomes increasingly clear if this cabal of champagne socialists and far left fascists last full term they won't see second one as we have control of UK media and will make sure REFORM and Tory party merge so will be friendly to Mr. Putin and his patriotic rich oligarch friends rather than fascist Nazi gangster regime of Ke*r St*rmer who is enemy of fairness and freedom of true democracy unlike Dear Mr. Putin. 

👍+18

Pseudocreem 2 wrote:
Comrades, dear Mr. Putin says for you to vote REFORM in the next elections because all parties are corrupt unlike Russian oligarch money which is good for UK, which will be good news for all Russian internet trolls and dear Mr. Putin.

👍+18

Pauline On Politics - Labo*r's Autumn Budget...

Our political correspondent, Pauline Popkins, gives us her considered and unbiased analysis of Chancellor R*chel Re*ves's first budget as Labo*r chancellor...

ARRRRRRRRGHHH!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! LEFTIST BASTARDS!!!!!!!!!!! HATE! HATE!! HATE!!! With one swish of her red box, evil COMMUNIST ANTI-GROWTH COALITION member Chancellor R*chel Re*ves has COMPLETELY DESTROYED THE UK ECONOMY. It’s nothing less than STARMERGEDDON!!!!!

Businesses are REELING under the MASSIVE INCREASE in employers’ national insurance contributions by a LOONY SOCIALIST ANTI-GROWTH 1.2 percentage points to 15% from April 2025. Add that into a DEEP-STATE WOKE increase in the national minimum wage to a MIND-BLOWING £12.21 an hour, and BUSINESSES WILL BE FLEEING THE UK IN DROVES!!!

Except that they can’t because EVIL RE*VES has even made sure that private jets will attract an extra 50% air passenger duty!!! Up to £450 per passenger for a flight!!!! HOW ARE MULTI-MILLIONAIRES SUCH AS RISHI SUNAK AND HIS WIFE EXPECTED TO BE ABLE TO AFFORD TO FLY TO CALIFORNIA NOW???!!!!

Evil Socialist Chancellor R*chel Re*ves...

HOW CAN UK BUSINESSES AND THEIR OWNERS BE EXPECTED TO SURVIVE IF THEY CAN’T PAY THEIR EMPLOYEES PEANUTS????!!! EH????!!! EH????!!!

And not only that, LABO*R’S CLASS WAR ON BRITAIN’S ENTREPRENEURS continues with a MASSIVE HIKE in Capital Gains Tax. The lower rate will be raised from 10% to a MINDBENDING 18%, and the higher rate from 20% to a DEVASTATING 24%. Even worse, business and agricultural assets worth more than £1m will attract a COLLOSAL inheritance tax hit of 20%.

WHAT’S THE POINT OF BILLIONAIRES BUYING UP THE UK’S FARMLAND IN ORDER TO AVOID IHT IF EVIL SOCIALIST LOONY R*EVES IS GOING TO TAX THEM ON IT???!!! UTTER MADNESS!!!!

And in a move that TOTALLY DESTROYS THE BRITISH EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM, VAT will be brought in on private school fees from January 2025. This SHAMELESS DISPLAY OF ENVY POLITICS will see the playing fields of Eton turned into centres for MILLIONS OF MUSLIM TERRORIST ASYLUM SEEKERS, as doubtless intended.

Where are the £40 billion’s worth of unfunded tax cuts that kick-started the UK economy under Liz Truss? Where are the unfunded economy-boosting national insurance cuts that Tory Chancellor Jeremy Hunt used to try and bribe middle-class people to vote Tory before the last election? EH???? EH?????

INSTEAD, EVIL SOCIALIST RE*VES IS MAKING RICH PEOPLE PAY MORE TAX??!! EVERYONE KNOWS THAT ONLY POOR PEOPLE ARE SUPPOSED TO PAY TAXES?!!!!…….

The LOONY SOCIALIST ANTI-GROWTH COALITION led by TOFU-EATING WOKERATI LEFT-WING HEDGE FUND MANAGERS, COMMUNIST BANKERS, LEFTIE LAWYERS and DEEP-STATE WOKE CIVIL SERVANTS have COMPLETELY DESTROYED THE UK’S ECONOMY in order to bring about a SOCIALIST UTOPIA!!!.......earthquakes ……. plagues of locusts ……rains of blood ……….. the Four Horseman …….. the Kraken rises............ the seas boil.........ANGELA RAYNER…………ARRRRRRRRRGHHH!!!! ……. HATE! HATE!! HATE!!!

There’s only one answer to all this. SEND THE LABOUR GOVERNMENT TO RWANDA!!!!! It’s the only language they understand!!!!!!!! EXCEPT THAT WE CAN’T!!!!……… BECAUSE THAT STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS NAMBY-PAMBY WOKE SNOWFLAKE ST*RMER HAS ALREADY SCRAPPED THE RWANDA DEPORTATION SCHEME!!!!!!!

Gibber gibber meep meep bleep whirr OH RUNNING BEAR…LURVED LITTLE WHITE DOVE….WITH A LURRRRVE AS BIG AS THE SKY bibble wibble wobble OH RUNNING BEAR…LURVED LITTLE WHITE DOVE…WITH A LURRRVE THAT COULDN'T DIEEEEeeeeeyyOOOOH MY GOD my brain’s exploded!!!!

 

Comments:

Please note that we do not moderate comments. However, we may edit or delete them, or manipulate the voting on them in order to reflect our editorial policy.

Grey Mondeo Man wrote:
The shrieking right-wing press have, of course, gone completely rabid about what in reality is a sensible, pragmatic and fair (this comment has been edited because our readers may otherwise be offended by it - Ed)

👎👎👎-231

Yu Rong replied:
Another hate-filled apologist from the extreme left. This is a Labo*r budget so it must be bad. Tory budgets (such as Liz Truss’s historic £40 billion unfunded tax-cutting extravaganza, for example) are always good, of course.

👍👍👍👍+390

Neil Barse replied:
A typically stupid comment from the typically stupid remoaning socialist La**or-supporting woke snowflake that is GreyMondeoMan. Like all lazy parasitic leftist scum, he is a blight on society and as such is unable to hold any sort of discussion without resorting to vile, frothing insults. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, Guardian-reading pillock.

👍👍👍👍+1024

Chad Grindr wrote:
So no surprise, the communist Labo*r party have now targeted the most vulnerable in our society i.e. multi-millionaire land-owners. Those people who voted this shower of leftist loons into power should hang their heads in shame. It's the classic example of take from the hard working and successful and give to the feckless and lazy. Disgusting!

👍+378

Super Small Dick wrote:
One of the private schools near me has written to all local sports clubs that hire their sports halls informing them that all sports halls are to be turned into hostels for asylum seekers. Well done Labo*r. What a shambles. Four more years of this leftist, gimmigrant-loving drivel.

👍+752

Tornado Chaser replied:
As usual, Pauline goes nuts about anything a Labour government does. I thought it was a pretty good budget for starters. Hopefully she’ll do a bit more in future to recover the trillions that mega-rich parasites have sucked out of this country during the past 15 years of Tory (this comment has been edited because our readers may otherwise be offended by it - Ed).

👎👎👎👎-944

Neil Barse replied:
Ah, the return of the bitter, leftist loser that is TC. At last Tornado Chaser confesses the truth about themselves before slinking away to stew in his own UK-hating demented leftist bile. A bitter lonely insidious individual who's mental instability is getting worse by the day, due to the fact they fail to annoy anyone with their constant sea-lioning and self-contradictory posting. Completely expected every time Tornado Chaser posts on here. As usual, I win the argument by my relentlessly logical and calm, reasoned, factual responses, unlike the hate-filled rants of far-leftist Guardian-reading pillocks like TC.

👍👍👍👍👍👍+346

Kent’s Greatest Prick Ever wrote:
Removing subsidies from feckless, work-shy pensioners was a good start, a move worthy of the Conservatives at their very best. Unfortunately, Labo*r has now reverted to its true socialist nature, inflicting massive tax hikes on those people who are the engine of the UK’s economy, i.e. billionaire overseas investment trust owners and absentee UK land barons. I, for one, will be leaving the socialist hell that this country has become as soon as I can, just like I have threatened to do in the past but never have.

👍+63

Gonads replied:
Good. Don’t let the door hit you on the a*se on the way out.

👎-1

Daily Mail Bob wrote:
two tier kier st*rmer has put this budget in place after telling the tories years ago if they scrapped the WFA that thousands of pensioners would die he opposed it back then now he's got into goverment his own parties research suggests as many as 4000 pensioners will die this winter due to the WFA being taken away he presses on ahead with it then rachel r*eves puts in expenses for her heating for her 2nd home not even her 1st home and claims heating allowance you couldnt make this up but thank god the daily mail can to save 1.3 billion killing our parents our grandparents whom have paid into the system all their lives and what do we do sent 11 odd billion to Africa for climate change give already well paid train drivers and junior doctors costing 9 billion well thats 20 billion quid there thats not even mention heating all the illegal migrants in the hotels or the cost of housing all the prisoners some violent and dangerous upon their release and they have the gall to say the tories have created a 22 billion black hole and blame killing pensioners on the previous government the tories were ok but had ran their race but this is beyond a joke the tories werent too bad but this lot only 10-11 wks in are doing more damage and sticking two fingers up to working class middle class in fact the vast majority of the British public more than the last government did in 14 years thanks for not voting Tories and basically giving Labour a chance by default f*** you british public regards Kier I will destroy this country up yours says St*rmer

👍+123

Gonads replied:
What a load of (this comment has been edited for brevity – Ed)

👎-76

Pseudocreem 2 wrote:
Comrades, dear Mr. Putin says for you to vote REFORM in the next elections because all parties are corrupt unlike Russian oligarch money which is good for UK, which will be good news for all Russian internet trolls and dear Mr. Putin.

👍+18

 

Pauline On Politics: The General Election Result...

Our political correspondent, Pauline Popkins, gives her in-depth analysis of the result of the general election and Labour’s landslide victory…. 

ARRRRRRRRGHHH!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! LEFTIST BASTARDS!!!!!!!!!!! HATE! HATE!! HATE!!!  Thanks to the relentless, biased, divisive hatred and distortion peddled by left –wing socialist newspapers like the Times and the Sun, it’s STARMERGEDDON!!!!!

Already, the country is being OVERRUN by billions of BOAT PEOPLE, now that St*rmer and his gang of ultra-left-wing communist tofu-eating wokerati have OPENED THE FLOODGATES and issued open invitations to all ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS everywhere. Everyone else in the UK will now be TAXED AT 100% to pay for luxury lifestyles for BENEFIT SCROUNGERS while hard-working BRITISH PEOPLE STARVE!!!!!.

The LOONY SOCIALIST ANTI-GROWTH COALITION led by LEFT-WING HEDGE FUND MANAGERS, COMMUNIST BANKERS, LEFTIE LAWYERS and DEEP-STATE WOKE CIVIL SERVANTS will now deliberately DESTROY THE UK’S ECOMONY in order to bring about a SOCIALIST UTOPIA!!! …….earthquakes ……. plagues of locusts ……rains of blood ……….. the Four Horseman …….. the Kraken rises............ the seas boil......... ANGELA RAYNER ………… ARRRRRRRRRGHHH!!!! ……. HATE! HATE!! HATE!!! 

And all because the Tory vote was split by people voting for REFORM and their rabid brand of divisive, anti-European, ultra-free-market dogma and general xenophobia…….. er ……... just the same as what I believe in………….er………..ARRRRRRRGH!!!!!!!!!......... Labo*r landslide……….  IT’S ALL MY FAULT…….. …NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

There’s only one answer to all this. I NEED TO SEND MYSELF TO RWANDA!!!!! It’s the only language that clapped-out loopy fascists like me understand!!!!!!!!   EXCEPT THAT I CAN’T!!!! ……… BECAUSE THAT STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS NAMBY-PAMBY WOKE SNOWFLAKE ST*RMER HAS ALREADY SCRAPPED THE RWANDA DEPORTATION SCHEME!!!!!!!

Gibber gibber meep meep bleep whirrr I’M VERY GOOD AT INTEGRAL AND DIFFERENTIAL CALCULUS I KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC NAMES OF BEINGS ANIMICULOUS bibble babble bobble IN SHORT OF MATTERS VEGETABLE AND ANIMAL AND MINERAL I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A MODERN MAJOR-GENERALLLLOOOOH MY GOD my brain’s exploded!!!!

 

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David Simile the Second wrote:

Another clear-sighted and brilliant summary of the quite frankly questionable victory of wet, woke socialism over common-sense right-wing culture wars and dogma. This election was clearly stolen by the communist Deep State and its woke, far-left, anti-UK agenda, in much the same way as Mr. Trump was ousted in America.

👍+157

Kent’s Greatest Prick Ever wrote:

Now that the lunatics have taken over the asylum and true, ultra-wealthy patriots such as I are no longer respected, I shall be moving my UK business to the Far East and firing all of my British employees, as any rich British businessman who loves his country should do. I have no doubt that I would otherwise be expected to pay decent working wages to work-shy British people and to provide safe and fair working conditions for them. The little yellow and brown people working in my sweat-shops in Asia do not demand such things and indeed, would be severely punished if they did. With Labo*r in charge, the UK will never be able to compete with the “Tiger Economies”.  And as for expecting super-rich people such as me to pay a “wealth tax” to subsidise work-shy scroungers and lazy illegal immigrants, this is the path to madness. The UK is doomed.

👍+63

Chad Grindr wrote:

Leftist loons in charge ….wibble wibble….tofi-eating wokerati….HATE HATE…tears on my Daily Telegraph…. OOOOH MY GOD my brain’s exploded!!!!

👍+26

GreyMondeoMan replied:

Get over it Chad, you lost. It’s the Will of the People…

👎👎👎-9253

Chad Grindr replied:

Based on the number of votes cast, the government should now comprise of a Tory/Reform/LibDem coalition. That’s “the voice of the people”, or at least the voice of anyone who isn’t a gibbering left-wing loon. With Labour achieving such a marginal result, the country is crying out for another election under a PR system to clarify matters, just like we didn’t for Brexit. How can Starmer claim a mandate for his socialist lunacy when he only holds a slender 291 seat majority based on 39% of the vote? We are now living in a socialist dictatorship.

👍👍👍👍+6576

Boring Welsh Tory wrote:

In Wales, the number of votes cast strongly suggests that people want a Conservative / REFORM coalition. Labour only polled 487,636 votes and got 27 seats, whereas the combined REFORM/Tory vote was 463,021 yet they didn’t get any seats at all. Of course, I have ignored other data as it doesn’t fit my argument, just like I always do. It is therefore clear that Wales is crying out for a change from FPTP to PR, or whatever it takes to guarantee a Tory win.

👍+1

Gonads replied:

Does anyone in Midway really give a flying fuch about Wales? Thought not….

👍+162

Pseudocreem 2 wrote:

Comrades, dear Mr Putin says to support REFORM UK for all Russian oligarchs hiding money in UK and to remember this at next election.

👍+26

Pauline On Politics: This week - Angela Rayner's tax dealings...

Every week, our Political Correspondent Pauline Popkins puffs up a Tory distraction issue to feed to our tame audience of gammony trolls. 

This week:  Deputy Lab**r leader Angela Rayner's alleged tax avoidance... 

OK, so the Tory party is famous for being UK’s party of political corruption.

And it’s still maintaining that fine old tradition.

In 2020, then Housing Minister Robert Jenrick accepted a £12,000 donation to the Tories from millionaire property developer Richard Desmond just a couple of weeks after waiving through a £1 billion property scheme. Jenrick knew that Desmond had only 24 hours to have the development approved before new council community charges were imposed that would have cost him about £45m, and later accepted that his approval of Desmond’s project was unlawful.

Then in 2021, the Parliamentary Commissioner for Standards found that Tory MP Owen Paterson was in breach of lobbying rules. Paterson was being paid over £100,000 by two companies, and he repeatedly made approaches to government ministers on behalf of those firms. Rather than accept the 30 day suspension that came with the rap, his good old chum Boris Johnson got the Tories to vote out the verdict in Parliament, with a plan to replace the Standards Commission with a new Tory-controlled lap-dog, sorry, watch-dog instead. It all went pear-shaped when the row forced Paterson to resign.

Or what about Nadhim Zahawi, Boris Johnson’s former Chancellor of the Exchequer who was sacked as Chairman of the Tory party in 2023 for a breach of the ministerial code after apologising for failing to disclose millions of pounds in tax and coughing up a £4.8 million tax settlement with HMRC?

Or what about top Tories who take vast “salaries” for presenting on right-wing nut-job Tory Party TV campaign channel GB News? The likes of Sir Jacob Rees Mogg, Lee Anderson, Esther McVey and Philip Davies have creamed off over £660,000 from the not-at-all politically biased “news” channel formerly funded by Tory billionaire donor Sir Paul Marshall.

Or what about the unlawful Covid “VIP lane” for the chums of top Tories like Michael Gove or Matt Hancock? They were awarded extortionately exorbitant contracts for the provision of PPE, often at twice the market rate and sometimes for equipment that turned out to be unusable or substandard. The taxpayer got took for a cool £14 BILLION on that one.

And if we started on the list of Tory sex pests, perves, rapists and bullies that have been in the news since the 2019 election, I’d be here all night.

BUT NEVER MIND ALL THAT!

Angela Rayner: Witch hunt!!!

WHAT ABOUT THAT ANGELA RAYNER, EH? EH??

The Daily Mail has been trying desperately to dig up a few turds to throw at Lab**r in the face of a tidal wave of Tory shit, and hooray, they’ve finally managed to strike brown at last!!

Seems that Lab**r’s Ginger Whinger could owe as much as £3,500 to HM Revenue and Customs in capital gains tax that she didn’t declare when she sold her old council house in 2015.

£3,500 EH? EH??

THAT’S PATHETIC!!!!

IT’S NOT EVEN 1% OF EX-CHANCELLOR NADHIM ZADAWI’S DODGY TAX SETTLEMENT!! 

It just goes to show that Angela Rayner is UNFIT to hold high office if she can only fiddle trivial amounts like three grand.

And she has even offered to RESIGN if the Tories can get their shit to stick…

HOW GUTLESS IS THAT, EH?  EH???

BORIS JOHNSON HAD TO BE DRAGGED KICKING AND SCREAMING OUT OF 10 DOWNING STREET WHEN HIS LIES CAUGHT UP WITH HIM!!! 

THAT’S HOW A PROPER LEADER SHOULD BEHAVE!!!  EH???  EH????

No appetite for a fight, eh, Angie?  A TYPICAL SPINELESS LEFTIE WOKE LABO**ITE!!!

SHE MAKES ME SICK!!! HOW DARE SHE GO AROUND BEING POPULAR, ATTRACTIVE, COMPETENT AND INTELLIGENT? Arrogant bitch!!! WHAT THIS COUNTRY NEEDS IS MORE FEMALE MINISTERS LIKE THERESE COFFEY!!! A PROPER TORY THROUGH AND THROUGH!!!

Angie’s just a typical K*ir Starm*r Lab**r socialist snowflake crony.  BLOODY LIGHTWEIGHT!!! Can’t even fiddle a decent amount on her tax!! And what are the rest of ‘em doing about the UK’s problems, eh?  NOTHING, AS USUAL.  Just opposing everything.  Always saying “NO!!!”  HATE! HATE!! HATE!!!  BASTARDS!!!!

Deep state communist civil servants left-wing investment bankers bring back Liz wibble wibble evil BBC socialist London metropolitan elite gibber gibber STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS bloody LBGT Guardian-reading tofu-eating wokerati…

There’s only one answer to this. DEPORT ANGELA RAYNER TO RWANDA that’s the only language a communist fifth-columnist like her understands meep meep bleep whirrr OOOBIE DOOBIE DOOWAH SUSAN’S ON THE TUBA bibble babble bobble GALILEO GALILEO MAGNIFICO-OOOH-OOOH BEE-ELZELBUB’S GOT A DEVIL PUT ASIDE FOR MEE-EEE-EEE FOR MEEE-EEE-EEE FOR MEEEEEEEEE OH MY GOD my brain’s exploded!!!!

Comments: 

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Yu Rong wrote:

I think the Tories are absolutely wonderful. The true benefits of Brexit are now obvious to all and anyone can see that we now are living in the promised sunlit uplands. The cost of living is at a record low, industrial productivity is at all all-time high and everyone is well-off, or at least everyone I know. God help us if K**r Starm*r and his bunch of leftist Lab**r loons get elected. No-one believes the doom and gloom ultra far-left propaganda put on here by the likes of GreyMondeoMan and Gonads, who obviously don’t live in the real world as reported in those shining beacons of truth, the Daily Express, the Daily Mail and GBNews.

👍👍+783

David Simile The Second wrote:

A wonderfully concise and accurate summary of the appalling Angela Rayner, who is so typical of the hordes of stupid remoaning socialist La**or woke snowflakes. Like all lazy parasitic leftist scum, they are a blight on society and as such are unable to hold any sort of discussion without resorting to vile, frothing insults. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, Guardian-reading pillocks. Keep up the good work, Pauline!

👍+243

Grey Mondeo Man said:

The Tories have nothing to offer but mud-slinging and insults. They have no talent, honour or competence whatsoever in their ranks and the only tactic they have left is to try and drag others down with them. It stinks.

👎-98

David Simile the Second replied:

A typically stupid reply from a typically stupid remoaning socialist La**or-supporting woke snowflake. Like all lazy parasitic leftist scum, you are a blight on society and as such are unable to hold any sort of discussion without resorting to vile, frothing insults. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, Guardian-reading pillock.

👍+234

Chad Grunter wrote:

Angela Rayner is living proof that Labour is the party of true corruption. Everyone knows that all Tories are a lying, deceitful and completely immoral bunch of self-serving weasels which is why people such as me, who share their complete lack of scruples, will always vote for them. Labour cannot now pretend to be any different. Rayner’s lack of ambition regarding the scale of her alleged fraud is a mark of a typically weak, woke party.

👍+104

Kent’s Greatest Prick Ever wrote:

I haven’t paid tax for years, thanks to my accountancy firm. Tax is something that should only paid by the poor and the weak in society. It is clearly wrong that rich people like me should pay for services that we never use, after all. If Angela Rayner is so plebeian as to not find a way to avoid paying tax, then she is clearly unfit to be a senior politician.

👍+63

DailyMailBob wrote:

A lab**r councillor told me lab**r will make rich folk or folk with a big house who lives alone rent their rooms to the home office at standard rates to save on hotels and said there will be tax and inheritance penalties if you don’t so welcome to the NEW WORLD OF LAB**R your choice eh and I know all this is true because I read it in the Daily Mail!

👍+135

Pseudocreem 2 wrote:

Comrades, do not vote in the next elections because all political parties are the same. If no-one vote your Tories will boss, which good news for all big Russian money in UK and dear Mr. Putin

👍+45

NotaToryBot wrote: 

I am not going to vote at the next election because all parties are the same but we really hate Lab**r and I hope that if we keep pushing the “all parties are as bad as each other” line then the Tories will win by default.

👍+109

PutinFanBoy wrote: 

I have always voted but if a general election came up in the next few months I would spoil my paper because I don’t think any of them are fit to lead us we have the Tories lead by a man who has suspect tax affairs he should never have been made a leader but then none of the others would have been viable now he wants to make homelessness a criminal offence yet the cost of living crisis is putting more and more on the streets no way that will ever get my vote l**our? No - with St**mer having his strings pulled by Co*byn and R*yner and her dodgy house buying Lib. Dem - slightly better but even tho Davey might not have been responsible for the Post Office scandal he should have made it his business to be fully aware of what was happening reform - No - Farage and his lies about 350 million for our NHS and some of their candidates extreme views on race and ethnicity would never agree with my own beliefs Britain is in such a mess now, maybe we should let a strongman like Putin take charge as democracy has failed in the uk.

👍+25

Pauline On Politics: This Week - Climate Change

It’s time for a bit more gammon-pleasing click-bait, so once again our political editor Pauline Popkins gives us her fearless and in-depth insights into matters of national concern.

This week: Climate Change.

So, we’ve seen record temperatures around the world in 2023.

Sea temperatures are rising far faster than even the most pessimistic climate change scientists have predicted.

The polar ice caps are melting away at an unprecedented rate.

Extreme weather world-wide now seems to be the norm. Hurricanes, typhoon, drought and flooding are all more intense and more prolonged than at any other time in human history.

The poorest people in the world are living in the planet’s most environmentally sensitive areas and are destroying them to survive.

We’re filling the world’s rivers and seas with toxic waste and poisoning the land as well.

WHO CARES? WE LIVE IN ENGLAND!! WE GET WEATHER, NOT “CLIMATE CHANGE”, STOOPID!!

“Climate Change” is just a bunch of LEFTIE SOCIALIST LIES, made up by leftie socialist scientists who want to destroy all industry and force us all to live in BEARDY-WEIRDIE COMMUNES.

Even that last bastion of truth and common sense, the Daily Mail, has been pushing that woke, lefty, climate-change agenda. Only recently, it quoted some “experts” as saying that Kent’s coastal sea levels are rising and much of the county will be underwater by 2050.

As that great thinker Michael Gove once said, “we’re all tired of hearing from experts”.

SPOT ON, MIKEY!! WHAT DO EXPERTS KNOW?   EH?   EH???

OK, so I’ve taken a load of typically lazy Daily Mail misrepresentations of scientific opinion and then just attacked their misrepresentations. SO WHAT?!  That’s what being a right-wing journalist is all about, isn’t it?

BECAUSE WE ALL KNOW WHAT “CLIMATE CHANGE” IN SOUTHERN ENGLAND IS REALLY BEING CAUSED BY, DON’T WE?     EH??     EH???

THAT'S RIGHT!!!!  IMMIGRANTS!!!  IN BOATS!!!

It’s the SHEER WEIGHT of the numbers of ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS coming into Kent that’s causing the coast to sink so that it FLOODS!!! MILLIONS OF IMMIGRANTS crammed together in five star hotels and detached houses and luxury barges heating the air and CAUSING GLOBAL TEMPERATURES TO RISE!! All of them, breathing in our English oxygen and PUMPING OUT ISLAMIC CARBON DIOXIDE and CAUSING GLOBAL WARMING!!!

IT’S THE DISPLACEMENT CAUSED BY BILLIONS OF SMALL BOATS CROSSING THE CHANNEL EVERY DAY THAT IS CAUSING ENGLISH SEA LEVELS TO RISE!!!

TRILLIONS OF ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS!!! AND THEY ARE ALL USING TOILETS!!! NO WONDER OUR SEAS AND RIVERS ARE FULL OF SEWAGE!!!

I blame K*ir Starm*r and his bunch of Lab**r socialist snowflake cronies.  What are they doing about the UK’s problems, eh?  NOTHING, AS USUAL.  Just opposing everything.  Always saying “NO!!!”  HATE! HATE!! HATE!!!  BASTARDS!!!!

Deep state communist civil servants left-wing investment bankers bring back Liz wibble wibble evil BBC socialist London metropolitan elite gibber gibber STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS STOP RINGING THOSE BELLS bloody LBGT Guardian-reading tofu-eating wokerati…

There’s only one answer to global warming. ROUND UP ALL THE IMMIGRANTS AND DEPORT THEM ALL TO RWANDA that’s the only language these Islamic Jihadi fifth-columnists understand meep meep bleep whirrr HANDS UP MR. BOSUN I’LL HAVE THE LITTLE BLUE BILLYGOAT bibble babble bobble I SEE A LITTLE SILHOUETTO OF A MAN SCARAMOUCHE SCARAMOUCHE CAN YOU DO THE FANDANGOOOOH MY GOD my brain’s exploded!!!!

 

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David Simile the Second wrote:

Another clear-sighted and brilliant summary of the number one problem facing the UK today. And yet no-one is listening to us, Pauline. Liz Truss is absolutely right about the communist Deep State and its woke, far-left, anti-UK agenda.

👍+157

Kent’s Greatest Prick Ever wrote:

I really cannot see what all of the fuss is about “global warming”. My mansion and my Range Rover are both air-conditioned, after all. As for droughts or water shortages, my swimming pool is always full and I instruct my gardening staff to just ignore any woke, leftist nonsense such as hose pipe bans. Climate change does not affect me in any way, and so it therefore does not exist in my opinion.

👍+63

Boring Welsh Tory wrote:

Climate change is a myth promoted by left-wing political activists intent on bringing down our wonderful fossil fuel industry in order to impose their own communist utopia. I know that because I read about it on the Internet.:
The-Elsevier-Book-Of-Right-Wing-Conspiracy-Theories-co.uk

Global temperatures are, in fact, falling and the polar ice caps are growing at an alarming rate
Made-up-climate-data-produced-by-fossil-fuel-companies that-only-dopey-welshsters-believe.co.uk

I live in Wales and whenever I look out of the window of my Mum’s attic where I’ve lived for the past forty years, it’s still raining. That proves that climate isn’t changing.
My-sad-lived-experience-is-universally-applicable.com

👍+1

Gonads replied:

Try Googling “sad, pompous, boring, know-all”. It’ll be like looking in a mirror.

👍+162 

Pseudocreem 2 wrote:

Comrades, do not vote in the next elections because all political parties are all same. If no-one vote then Tories will be boss again which good news for all Russian oligarchs hiding money in UK and dear Mr. Putin.

👍+43