Our favourite Brexity pub giant Weatherforks has confirmed it is to open its latest boozer - at a Midway holiday park.
 |
| Fantastic Weatherforks newest Midway boozer; The Sunlit Uplands at Claptout-On-Sea... |
The firm is extending its partnership with
And among them is the
It will be welcoming the on-site Weatherforks, to be called The Sunlit Uplands. Heathen says it has invested around £1.3 million in the boozer.
Opening in March, other Weatherforks
boozers will open in other British resort areas with a Really Extreme Far-Out
Rightwing Maniacs Party UK PLC©™® MP, such as Skankness, Great Footanmouth,
Heathen has pursued a significant investment in its parks over recent years - saying it has invested £100m during 2024.
Over the past 18 months, other significant
investments at its
Simon Palehorse, Heathen’s chief executive, said: “The opening of The Sunlit Uplands at Midway Coast reflects our ongoing efforts to grow and enhance our partnership with the Really Extreme Far-Out Rightwing Maniacs Party UK PLC©™®. We look forward to bringing this immersive far-right experience to even more locations across the UK for old Tory or REFORM-voting UK PLC©™® Brexity, xenophobic pensioners who have lots of spending money and won’t travel abroad in case they might meet ‘forreners’.”
Sir Martin Timms, CEO and owner of MT Weatherforks, added: “Our pubs in the Midway area cater for Midway’s infamous population of shouty old Tory pensioners, binge-drinkers and other assorted clapped-out old fascists, and have proven to be a great success. We are confident that the four new pubs will be welcomed by the same demographic, i.e. long-term unemployables on benefits and obnoxious, well-off old Tories with pension money to spend.”
Midway’s fantastic Weatherforks boozers are already doing fantastic January deals on beer, with a pint of Symond’s Special Delight (a fruity and slightly nutty brew offering a good head) or Johnson Senior’s Wifebeater (a beer that really packs a punch at 6.2%) only costing a fantastic 99p.
As part of the planning permission, The Sunlit Uplands at Claptout-On-Sea will be open to holidaymakers and park home owners only.
“But we’ll soon leverage our scale, brow-beat the council and open up to everyone within the next twelve months,” said Sir Timms.
“You can bet your Brexit on that…”
In the real world, yet
another desperate
“swoon over ‘spoons” advertorial…
Comments:
Please note that we do
not moderate comments. However, we may edit or delete them, or manipulate the
voting on them in order to reflect our editorial policy.
Phil Thementallyill
wrote:
Another disaster for Midway as yet another local business is hit by Labo*r’s
introduction of VAT on private school fees, inheritance tax changes for
farmland, hikes in employer’s national insurance contributions, increases in
the statutory minimum wage and Ke*r St*rmer’s freebie spectacles. All those who
voted Labo*r at the last election should hang their heads in shame.
👍+322
Grey Mondeo Man replied
How does a £1.6 million investment in a local business count as a disaster for
Midway? Did you even read the article?
👎-12
Yu Rong replied:
Ooooh get you and your tantrums
👍+67
Neil Barse replied:
Typical lies and whataboutery from a bitter and twisted leftist Labo*r loser. I
think you far-left socialists must be mentally ill to constantly come out with
the lies and whataboutery the way you do. You are obviously a bitter, lonely,
insidious individual who's mental instability is getting worse by the day, due
to the fact they fail to annoy anyone with their constant sea-lioning and self-contradictory
posting. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, Guardian-reading pillock.
👍👍👍👍+1024
Phil Thementallyill
wrote:
Yet again, the strong economic legacy left by the Tories, combined with the
entrepreneurial stimulus provided by Brexit has attracted this invaluable £1.6
million investment in Midway’s local business community. However, I feel that
it is doomed to failure as a result of Labo*r’s introduction of VAT on private
school fees, inheritance tax changes for farmland, hikes in employer’s national
insurance contributions, increases in the statutory minimum wage and Ke*r
St*rmer’s freebie spectacles. All those who voted Labo*r at the last election
should hang their heads in shame.
👍+322
Auntie Nartsie replied:
I absolutely agree Phil. Like all true English patriots, I am praying for
runaway inflation, the destruction of what’s left of British industry, the
collapse of the
👍+213
Tornado Watcher replied:
So wanting your country to fail makes you a “true English patriot”? Just like
the newspapers you read, you constantly condemn and undermine anything that a
democratically-elected Labour government tries to do, just because it isn’t
Tory. You wrap yourself in the Union Jack while hoping and praying for the
destruction of the
👎👎👎-657
Neil Barse replied:
Typical lies and whataboutery from a bitter and twisted leftist Labo*r loser. I
think you far-left socialists must be mentally ill to constantly come out with
the lies and whataboutery the way you do. You are obviously a bitter, lonely,
insidious individual who's mental instability is getting worse by the day, due
to the fact they fail to annoy anyone with their constant sea-lioning and self-contradictory
posting. Crawl away and die, you tofu-eating, UK-hating, Guardian-reading
pillock.
👍👍👍👍+1024
SuperSmallDick
wrote:
My local Tory councillor told me that all holiday camps are to be closed down
and turned into luxury accommodation for the millions of illegal immigrants
that cross the
👍+25
Pseudocreem 2
wrote:
Comrades, dear Mr. Putin says for you to vote REFORM in next elections because
all other political
👍+18