Midway's Claptout-On-Sea's MP Condemns Labo*r Government's Budget In New Video

Niglet the Gargoyle: working hard for his constituents

From his current American residence, Niglet the Gargoyle (owner of the Really Extreme Far Out Right-Wing Maniacs UK Party®™© PLC and MP for the Midway constituency of Claptout-on-Sea) has warned that Labo*r’s “inheritance tax raid will destroy rural communities” as he blasted K*ir St*rmer and R*chel Re*ves for “declaring war on small family farms owned by billionaire tax exiles”.

In a slickly-filmed new video posted on Xcrement (cleverly made to look as though the Claptout-on-Sea MP had actually visited a farm in his constituency, even though he is really in North America campaigning for fellow right-wing maniac, presidential candidate Donald Turnip) Gargoyle met a farmer set to be impacted by the Chancellor’s new Budget.

Evil Labo*r Chancellor R*chel Re*ves

Speaking to an actor (Hank Methane) pretending to be a third-generation UK farmer, the Really Extreme Far Out Right-Wing Maniacs UK Party®™© PLC owner said Labo*r “doesn’t understand” the circumstances of most UK family farms.

The Gargoyle said: “So I've just arrived at a 300-acre family farm. It's in its third generation. It's got 2 or 3 houses, outbuildings and some farm animal thingies”.

“The Budget has been just the most massive shock for the farmer here, Hank Methane.

“In a moment I'm going to chat to him and he's in, I have to say, in a pretty distressed state.”

“The big shock in the budget was inheritance tax on farmland; farmland handed down through the generations and then bought up by my good friend and party donor, billionaire UK tax-exile Mick Darkson.”

He asked Mr. Methane: “Hank, this is a family farm. So you finish up with a situation when Mr. Darkson kicks you off what was once your land in order to sell it to developers and shift his money abroad, what will you have to do?”

Hank Methane: typical UK farmer... 

Mr. Methane responded: “I don't know, buddy, Obviously I gotta get some sorta advice from someone.”

“Not that I can actually afford speak to anyone at the minute, what with all the attorneys and accountants being signed up to work for rich people like Mr. Darkson, but it’s obviously something I gotta look into.”

“I've done a kinda rough estimate for myself. I’ll probably just have to stop, to be honest, just so I can keep a roof over the heads and stuff.”

“So there we have it”, concluded Niglet the Gargoyle. “This evil Labo*r government has declared a class war upon poor innocent billionaire tax exiles such as my very good friend Mick Darkson. As a result, thousands of small farmers will be thrown off their land.”

“The British countryside will be destroyed when these farms get sold by their billionaire tax-exile owners to overseas property developers, who will then build vast concrete estates of shoddily-built buy-to-let housing that will be filled by government-subsidised asylum seekers. And it’s all K*ir St*rmer’s fault.”

“So remember to Vote for the Really Extreme Far Out Right-Wing Maniacs UK Party®™© PLC at the next elections. We don’t have any answers, but at least we’ll blame immigrants and suck up to overseas dictators, megalomaniac billionaires and rich Russian oligarchs…”