M234 Reopened After Six-Car Smash This Morning

Stock photo of smashed-up police car

The M234 Midway Bridge has now reopened after a six-car smash led to its closure earlier today.

Police have arrested the driver of a high-powered Audi who rammed several police cars before attempting to drive off after being stopped on the motorway. The motorist had been pulled over after being spotted driving erratically and at speeds in excess of 110 mph. A breath test revealed him to have 140 milligrams of alcohol in 100 ml of breath - four times the legal limit.

According to police, the driver then shouted “I’m too important to be held up by you oiks, I’ll be having words with your Chief Inspector,” before jumping back into his car and speeding off.

After a chase involving several police patrol vehicles, the driver finally collided with four other drivers, forcing them off the road before being boxed in by two police cars. Even then, the driver tried to ram his way out of the enclosure before being dragged from his vehicle and arrested. His wife, a passenger, bit the hand of an officer attempting to get her out of the vehicle, the bite requiring several stitches.

“Other than the bitten police officer, there were fortunately no other injuries caused as a result of this incident,” a police spokesman said. “One man has been charged with driving under the influence of alcohol, resisting arrest, dangerous driving and various other traffic-related offences. A woman has also been charged with assault and resisting arrest.”

The couple have been remanded in custody.


Comments: 

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Chad Grunter wrote:

That must have been one hell of a party to still be four times the limit at eight in the morning.

👍+7

Kent’s Greatest Prick Ever wrote:

I often get drunk at the Lodge, get into my high-powered luxury Range Rover and then head for home. Of course, I am rich enough to be able to afford a chauffeur. I have little sympathy for anyone who is so poor that they have to drive their own vehicle themselves. Life would be so much better for everyone if paupers were to be kept off of the roads and out of the way of rich people such as myself.

👍+63

Boring Welsh Tory wrote:

Electric cars are well known for their propensity to go out of control and burst into flames, killing everyone within a five-mile radius due to their highly-dangerous radioactive lithium batteries. I know this because I read it on the Internet:

Petrol-Company-Disinformation-For-Gullible-Sad-Idiots.co.uk.

The push for adoption of electric cars is, of course, a left-wing plot based on the non-existent threat of climate change, itself based on efforts to undermine our economy and impose a global communist hegemony led by Bill Gates and the alien lizard people:

Batshit-American-Conspiracy-Theories-For-Trump-Supporters.com.

👍+1